Happy Valentine’s Day to Professional Triathletes

This year, I don’t have a valentine. Instead, I would like to extend this to all the professional triathletes out there!

Dear My Beloved Professional Triathletes – I love you and here’s 10 reasons why:

1. I love when pros provide an excellent base on which I can critically judge how fast I am. Comparing my times to pros’ is like me trying to hit a 90 mph fastball during my bar softball league’s off-season.

2. I love your positive attitude!

“Hey how did your race go?”
“Well, I didn’t get first…”

Thanks Andrew Starykowicz, gotta love Racine 2014!

3. I love to look at pros’ bikes and not feel self-conscious about my bike at all!

Photo ourtesy of Matthew Vandersande

Photo courtesy of Matthew Vandersande

4. I love the gels you drop along the way….thank you, from my bike tires and frame!

5. I love the pros because they pull all the officials up front, so I can draft off of all the middle aged women from earlier waves. #TriMilfs

6. I love the pros when they bonk out on the run and walk with their head down. The kids looking up to you will always remember the words you used to get yourself across that finish line! Unless you DNF, then I have to explain what a quitter is.

7. Who doesn’t love when pro’s jump to the front of every line? Free food and convenience mean nothing to anyone but you!

8. I love that you disregard anything I say online. The fastest athletes also know the most, and who really follows anyone back on social media?

Photo courtesy of Matthew Vandersande

Photo courtesy of Matthew Vandersande

9. I would love to be on your age group team. Not all pros have them, but I bet yours is the best!

10. Finally, I love the pros because you devoted your life to doing something you love and that takes balls. It doesn’t matter if you’re a male or female athlete, you took the risk and reaped the reward. I will happily make a living elsewhere eating pizza and not crying on trainer rides. (No matter how much my father hates me.)

Happy Valentine’s Day!




About the Author

Follow this anonymous character on twitter: